Expect the Unexpected
by Nellen
Summary: Yuffie decides to try something out one night. Cloud is in holy hell. [Reffiefied and a bit of Clerith, CloTi, and TiRude... but not really.]


NOTE: I was reading an LJ challenge with the coupling "Yuffie and Reno." And was reading one of the stories and all of sudden, this idea popped in my head!

DISCLAIMER: Nope. But it would if I was a smart person.

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Expect the Unexpected

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A young girl was swirling a lock of her raven hair. She sighed and blew some air out, making her bangs float up. Apparently, they were watching some chocobo race. Yuffie insisted on going to the Battle Arena, but apparently, chocobo-head wanted to be in the chocobo race. How? There was no answer to that question.

Everyone was screaming "Go, Cloud!" or "You can do it, Cloud!" or what Yuffie thought, "You can do it! Cut his freaking balls off!" But of course that never happened. And as expected, Cloud won, gang congratulated, received money. Big deal. 'What was the whole point of having a ninja, anyway?' Yuffie thought. 'I could just steal the money! Even better! Steal other people's material and then sell it to GET the money! And then steal it back of course.'

"Yuff?"

Yuffie blinked and turned her head to the raven-haired girl, who continued by saying, "We're going to go and get something to eat." Of course, she didn't ask if Yuffie wanted to go. Because they all had to stick together. The only time they didn't was when… actually, that was a lot of times. But that's besides the point. Yuffie just shrugged and followed everybody.

Typical restaurant. Typical bar. Typical restaurant bar. They managed to come here every time they came to the Golden Saucer. After they ate, they stayed for another two hours or whatever until someone was tired. That's the plan. Usually, Cid went with Barret and Tifa to play some pool. Aerith and Cloud were flirting (which was of course annoying to everybody especially poor Tifa) and Cait Sith, Vincent, and Red XIII were playing cards. And hell, the dog won most of the time. You'd expect the freaking overstuffed mog to win, but no.

"Yo, this place hasn't changed."

"It never did change."

"I'm just saying. You guys kind of died on me. Especially you, Rude."

"I'm breathing."

Yuffie looked up to see three wonderful Turk... eys. Blondie, baldie, and… drunkie. No, wait. Scratch that. Yuffie thought Reno was sexy. But then again, it didn't fit with blondie and baldie.

Random fact: everyone wants something amazing or surprising to happen. That way, people will be entertained.

Yuffie, the daring she is, got up from her seat subtly and went over to the Turks.

"Hiya, Turkeys!" Yuffie greeted happily.

"My, you're certainly bubbly," Elena muttered.

Yuffie then went closer to Reno. Maybe, a centimeter away from their bodies touching. She leaned in towards his ear and whispered, "Look. I'm bored. I have nothing to do. I need to be entertained. And you just happen to be here."

Reno looked at with a confused expression. Rude eyeballed Yuffie and Elena raised an eyebrow. What the two Turks saw next left them speechless. Even Reno was shocked. But he went with it. Because Yuffie was a hot ninja.

---

So far, Tifa was winning. So far, Red XIII was winning. So far, Aerith and Cloud only just touched each other (NOT LIKE THAT. Just brushes.) Tifa, amazed at her work and seeing that she will be winning 2,000 gil from each player stood to the side and waited for her turn. She looked up and watch she saw messed up the whole pool game. She had some kind of spasm attack and fell down.

"Yo, Tifa! What the hell is your problem!" Barret asked.

Tifa jumped back up, knocking Barret's head in the process. She retained her posture and picked up her stick.

"Do I even want to know?" Cid asked cautiously.

"If you care about Yuffie. But I'm not saying that I don't care about her. It depends if you like, act like her older sibling or something, I don't know. It's all on how you look-"

"Teef?"

"Yes?"

"You're babbling."

"Well, I'm just… shocked… and… proud!"

"Proud of what?" Barret got back up to reposition the balls.

"Of little Yuffie!"

"Yo, she ain't little. She's like… a little big monster that stills your material and attacks you with nun-chucks."

"She uses shurikens."

"They hurt like hell, still! Damn, pointy things!"

"And what did Yuffie do? Give some materia back to some mofo she stole it from?"

Tifa stood there and thought. And then she said, "Actually, I don't think you would understand that much. Considering she's a girl and all."

Cid looked at her oddly and tried to find Yuffie. What he saw made him curse in almost ten languages. Barret followed suit and kind of… shouted out.

"YO, BRAT! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH THEM TURKS!"

This caused Elena and Rude to look up from their drinks (they decided to leave them alone. Hell, they didn't care who they were involved with.), Cloud and Aerith to look up from their flirting, and the vampire, the over stuffed mog, and the dog looked up from their card game. Mouths and cards were dropped. Also a tail. The Turks just shrugged and continue eating.

"STOP IT!" Barret shouted.

But Yuffie and Reno, who seemed to be enjoying it, didn't really… hear Barret.

Cloud, followed by Aerith, walked over to Tifa by the pool tables. Tifa turned her head to look at him and saw that the two of them were holding hands.

"What are they doing?" Cloud whispered angrily.

"Why are you whispering?" Tifa asked at normal volume.

"Because I freaking feel like it! Why the hell are they making out?"

"Well, it's Yuffie's decision. And 'side, they're cute together."

"Her decision?"

Tifa did one of her thinking looks and then said, "She experimented!" Cloud looked at her if she was stupid. She continued by saying, "You know! She wants to know what would happen if she'd kiss Reno or something! She's being daring!"

"What!" Cloud said. Tifa rolled her eyes.

"Like this, idiot!"

And with that, Tifa kissed Cloud. But noticing he wasn't kissing back, she pulled away. Cloud looked at her… with either an angry look or a confused look. No one can tell Cloud's emotions these days. Tifa rolled her eyes again and then explained.

"See, I wanted to know what would happen if I kissed you. So I was being the daring one. And well, you kind of didn't kiss back. So, yeah. Duh!"

"Why'd you kiss me?"

Tifa looked at him. Then she grabbed locks of his hair and pulled him towards her. And Cloud got holy hell.

"Tifa!" Aerith shrieked. And with every sentence Tifa said, she punched Cloud.

"This is for being so damn stupid! I was always there for you Cloud! You're such a fag, I can't believe I fell in love with you! Hell! I'm so damn stupid!"

---

"So… dibs on Tifa."

Elena looked at the bald-headed man. "What? You like her or something?"

He just shrugged. She then betted on Cloud.

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"Wow..."

"Yeah… Ooh! Look! I knew something would happen if I kissed you!"

Reno's face dropped.

"You kissed me to see what would happen?"

"I told you. I needed to be entertained," Yuffie told him and shrugged. She then smiled and said, "And after that make-out, I'm guessing that I like you and you like me."

"You guessed right, babe."

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"Yeah! Go, Tifa! Kick the hell out of that white boy!"

"Man. Cloud had it coming."

"Totally.

And with that, Cid and Barret had a smoke. Or Cid was smoking and Barret was breathing in the smoke.

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"I always thought you'd be with Yuffie!"

"Shut up, Sith."

The dog was silent.

---

"Stop it, Tifa!"

"Oh, come on!" Tifa said to Aerith as she looked up from her punching. Cloud seemed to be bruised. "You wanted him to notice you, right?"

"Well… Yes… but-"

"He did, right?"

"Yes, and-"

"But he never did say that he liked you or he never kissed you or you never even got the feeling he was gay?"

Aerith's mouth dropped open. She was crushing on a gay boy? Holy crap! And with that she started giving Cloud holy hell.

"Actually, he's not gay," Tifa said. Aerith glared at her and then went on her knees and said sorry to Cloud over and over and over again. She then curagad the heck out of him until he was up on his feet.

"What the hell was that for?" Cloud snapped at Tifa.

"I was bored. See! I wanted to see what would happen if I punched you!" Tifa said innocently.

"You're lucky I love you…" the leader muttered. Aerith could not believe her ears.

"What!" Aerith shrieked. "You love her!"

"Uhm… Yeah…"

"So, all that flirting? It was for nothing!"

"Not really."

"What?"

Cloud and Tifa looked at each other and then burst out laughing. Aerith narrowed her eyes. She then hissed, "You guys are so immature."

"I'm twenty."

"I'm twenty-one."

"Can't really blame us for that!"

And with that they started to laugh. Of course they were laughing at Aerith. Then Aerith started join in and everybody in the whole entire bar started laughing and DIED.

…

…

…

Not really.

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well… It didn't turn out like I hoped it would.

Review or else I'll die.

Actually, I won't. I'm not emo.


End file.
